Conflict Resolution

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One of the ways the principles and methods used by sociocracy speed up decision-making is going directly to objections instead of discussing the proposal. The proposal should state the perceived advantages or reasons why a decision is needed. The presenters will also have presented the issues and...
Views since 5/2014: 7,251
Question: We are 3 months into starting a co-housing community in western MA. We will soon be discussing how we will make group decisions. I don't think we have to reinvent the wheel on this one. Consensus and sociocracy seem to be common strategies. Which do you recommend? Sociocracy and...
Views since 5/2014: 9,172
"It is a strategy I think a community could use to jump start their program, and then talk about how to reduce the centralization after a year or more of successful meals. Since we have quite slowly added new households it is quite clear that our successful meals program is what has helped get more...
Views since 5/2014: 4,232
Architectural review policies are generally hard to write, partly because we have very different housing experiences when we move into cohousing and partly because we don't know how to talk about architecture or colors.. The process touches on understanding how to live in a jointly owned or managed...
Views since 5/2014: 3,771
In principle, most conflicts are because of mismatched expectations. Where the expectations are really different the conflict can be really big. No one likes disappointment: when you think something is going to be one way, and then it changes. The best prevention is a shared expectation of how...
Views since 5/2014: 2,723
In principle, when we look at people in certain ways, place labels on them, or “put them in boxes,” it limits what they have to offer. It is especially tempting to “contain” those who disagree with us. We are tempted to ignore our adversaries, work around them, wall them off, shut them down. These...
Views since 5/2014: 3,417
In principle, when we have expectations of others that don't pan out it often leads to resentment, which often leads to brewing discontent or bubbling-over conflict. I have heard, “expectations are planned resentments.” The surest way to avoid resentment is to not have expectations. When I fall...
Views since 5/2014: 2,111
In principle: If I have not tried to make something better or if I am not willing to help make it better, I have no business complaining about it. Rather than stand outside the circle and complain about the decisions made by others, I do well to appreciate those who are willing to do the hard work...
Views since 5/2014: 1,993
In principle, my initial reaction, my first thought, is very rarely my best. Often my first thought is absurd and shows me how NOT to react. Like first brush strokes on a canvas, first thoughts provide a starting place for more refined thoughts, for subsequent brush strokes. First thoughts, like...
Views since 5/2014: 1,782
In principle, the chances of making good group decisions are greatly increased if all the participants believe there is good in everyone. We are more likely to do well if we look for the best in each other. For some, believing that there is good in every person is a moral conviction. For others,...
Views since 5/2014: 2,458

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