blog author Janey Williams

Like many of us, I cracked in 2020. Trapped home alone with a one- and four-year-old, and all the worries of the world. But this cracking led to a kind of waking up – to the fact that, even before the pandemic, something had been off. I was worn, deprived of meaningful adult connection, and I felt that something vital was missing for my children too. The pandemic drove it to an extreme, but corrosive isolation had been wearing us down for some time. 

Where was the true community connection?

When my partner and I learned we’d be parents, I knew I wanted roots and community and I worked at it for years. We moved to the friendliest neighborhood in town. I joined the neighborhood council, the local mom’s club, and our local buy-nothing group. I created a block club.  But everyone was so busy, neighbors moved often, and nobody sent their kids out to play. After all that time and energy putting down roots, I didn’t really feel rooted. 

And then, in a podcast, I heard someone talking about what parenting was like in a cohousing community, and that was it. I knew this was what I wanted: Several community meals a week that you don’t have to plan. Relationships with people of all generations that deepen through working and playing together and through shared meals. Children who have the freedom to roam outside, play in unstructured, creative ways, and form meaningful relationships with kids and adults, outside of their immediate family. 

In cohousing, children are valued community members

Pre-teens and teenagers in cohousing get a greater sense of that much-sought-after independence and freedom, but within the safe container of community. They take on responsibilities that reflect their expanding abilities, and have a plethora of trusted adults to learn from and talk to as they move through what is often an exciting but challenging stage of development. They get to be a part of collaborative problem solving and group decision-making – learning to use their voice to make a difference. And they get to have so much fun (which teenagers still desperately need)! Hiking, sports, work parties, holiday and birthday celebrations, outings, retreats, game night, movie night, pool-play, talent shows, and of course common meals together usually three times a week – there’s always something going on. Friends are jealous and always wanting to come over because it’s so cool.

We found Cohousing ABQ online and fell in love with the people, the plans for the community, and the property right along the Rio Grande, walking distance to the Bosque and river. We took the plunge and moved to Albuquerque to help get the project done. It’s been years since that move, and a lot of sweat and hard work, but it is, finally, happening. 

Construction underway. Move-in starts late 2025. 

Our land is cleared, utilities are in, construction scheduled to start in May. Our homes and common house will be completed on a staggered schedule from December 2025 through May 2026. The community will have 25 homes, 23 of which have already been sold. We have 13 children so far, but for a short time our remaining one three-bedroom home and one four-bedroom home are reserved for families with children in hopes of getting that kid total even higher!

Sound appealing? Read more about us on cohousing.org or check out Cohousing ABQ. There you can check out members and sign up for an upcoming Meet and Greet Zoom event to learn more.

–Janey Williams