In these examples, exercises are used that are described in detail in The Cooperative Culture Handbook (CCH). This book may be purchased from FIC or Amazon.  

Working Toward a Goal

A member requested time at a meeting to address the ongoing problem of dog droppings around the community. The facilitator met with the member, we’ll call her Joan, and asked her what she hoped to achieve in the meeting. “What do you hope will be true at the end of the meeting that isn’t true now?”  Joan was uncertain. The two spent some time talking through the history, the frustration, the current situation, and the emotional energy Joan brought to the situation. 

After a bit, Joan was able to clarify that the result that she wanted was for there not to be dog droppings in the community any more.  In other words, she didn’t just want a chance to speak, she wanted members of the community to change their behavior to address the problem. Together Joan and the facilitator came to the conclusion that the community members already knew about the problem and how Joan felt about it.  What was needed to move toward her goal was for the members to actually engage in conversation about the problem.

At the meeting, the facilitator divided the members into groups of 10 and each group held a bridging circle (CCH, Exercise 6.1). In those circles people talked about the value they placed on their pets, the judgement they felt from other members, the fear they had for their organic garden, the need for fairness and a wide variety of ideas for addressing the problem. Following the bridging circles the facilitator used a spiral round (CCH, Exercise 21.2) to gather ideas for addressing the problem.  Some members volunteered to take on some of the ideas.  

The meeting did not 100% solve the problem in that some dog droppings continued to be present in the community. It did, however, engage the whole community in a community problem. Joan, who never spoke at the meeting, felt heard, valued and supported. Members left feeling more connected and warm toward each other and dog owners and others did do a better job of picking up poop.  

Stuck

A community was working with their architect to design their shared space. Some members wanted a hot tub, others didn’t. There had been several conversations. The facts were generally agreed. Some members valued the health and social benefits of a hot tub, others were concerned for cost, safety, insurance implications and aesthetics.  Further conversation wasn’t helping as members just made the same arguments again and again.  

The facilitator asked the group to pause and set aside all the reasons and cognitive arguments and look instead to their “heart space.”  The exercise “What Touches Us” (CCH Exercise 12.1) asked each member to share their emotional response to the issue.  The facilitator followed up with a round responding to the prompt “Something I have heard today that surprised me or changed my thinking was . . . “

Although the group wasn’t aligned, it was clear that a decision needed to be made in order for the group to move forward.  The facilitator chose the option that seemed most aligned with the group’s values and purpose based on the ideas and feelings shared in the group and proposed it.  The group took a couple of rounds to reach consensus, but they got there. Engaging in the emotional space opened up some flexibility, helped members see both sides and made it possible for some members to feel OK about moving forward in a direction they would not have chosen in order to move forward toward the bigger vision of living together in community.  

“I don’t feel heard.”

There was a proposal in process to designate an unused piece of community land for a dog park. As had happened before with other decisions, a small group wasn’t willing to consent to the proposal because they didn’t feel like they had been heard by the community. Others in the community insisted they had spent far too much time listening to this group already. The proposal had sat dormant for some months and a member was bringing it forward again.  

The facilitator knew that a typical discussion round would likely get stuck the same way it had before.  A deeper conversation would be required.  The facilitator asked each person to take five minutes to consider the issues they felt were most important in this topic and make a list of them.  Following that time to connect with their own individual values, the facilitator asked the members to pair off for a Mirroring exercise (CCH, Exercise 1.1), choosing a partner that they thought probably disagreed with them. The prompts for the exercise were:

1. What I think is good about the proposal is . . . 
2. What I think doesn’t work well about the proposal is . . .
3. Something I think you and I have in common is . . . 
4. Something I appreciate about you is . . . 

In the mirrored pair exercise, everyone felt deeply heard by one other member of the group and their need to be heard was addressed.  

The facilitator then did a round on the prompt, “One thing I think it’s important for the group to hear is . . . “ asking each to limit their response to one idea and a few sentences. At the end of the round the facilitator invited members to share anything that felt important that hadn’t been said yet.  

This process revealed some aspects of the proposal that could be improved, helped everyone feel their concerns had been heard, and yielded a proposal that the group could consent to. 

Ever wondered who should facilitate meetings? Read the next in our series of posts exploring how Facilitation can help you and your community here.

Learn more about how facilitation can strengthen your community with our upcoming event, The Power of Facilitation, on January 30th.

Interested in developing your facilitation skills? Join us for our 6-week Facilitator Training. From February 13 – March 20th, we’ll cover the structures that make meetings run well and the artistry of creative planning and intuition that build safety and connection. The course will be full of opportunities for participation and will meet you where you are. Learn more and register here.